September 14, 2005

One Month Away

Exactly one month away from marriage. All the invites are out. Things are reaching a fever pitch. Write your vows. Is Rob ordained? Pick up the rings. Tend to family. Drop off Liz at wedding shower(s). Learn to dance (better). RSVPs flooding mailbox. Sleep? What’s sleep? Rebook honeymoon (sorry New Orleans). Head-count for booze. Yes. Order lots more booze. Call the photographer. Call the bagpiper. Make sure the idiots get the tuxes right. I love you. Chocolate or vanilla? Seating arrangements. Go to courthouse for a marriage license. Collect music for booty-shakin’. Reserve hotel room. And on and on…

So much planning for one little day. Take time to sit back and breathe it all in. It still feels amazing.

Commentary (42):

1. Justin Ko says… sep 14, 2005 | 9:50 pm

Um, my invitation hasn’t arrived yet. What’s going on?

Oh yeah, that’s right, you don’t know me .…

2. Dave Simon says… sep 14, 2005 | 10:12 pm

Jason -

No matter how much planning you put into it now, you’ll do much more work on it the week of, the day before, etc.

My wife spent at least a year planning our wedding. The week before, she left to go to the location (my parent’s cabin in Red Lodge, MT.)

The Monday before the nuptuals, our cat got very sick, her kidneys shut down, and I had to put her down. That day, we also found out that the location for the wedding was evacuated due to a large forest fire in the area.

So in three days, my wife replanned everything, notified guests, and made arrangements for the ceremony to be at the location of the planned reception.

Luckily, it all worked out great. Everyone had a great time. The DJ rocked. We all got drunker than we’d ever been. Great party.

We just celebrated our 5th anniversary. Hope everything works out for you too. Have fun, don’t take it too seriously, and remember, she’s always right. ;)

3. Dan Mall says… sep 14, 2005 | 10:49 pm

At first glance, I thought it was “Reebok honeymoon” instead of “Rebook honeymoon”. Expect a pair of running shoes for each of you as my gift.

4. Keith says… sep 14, 2005 | 11:17 pm

It doesn’t end when the wedding is over. Then you’ve got:

Open gifts. Throw out ridiculous masses of styrofoam peanuts. More gifts. Thank you notes. Even more gifts. More peanuts. Trip to salvation army to get rid of old stuff. More thank you notes. Take the wife to visit distant relatives that couldn’t make the wedding. Call the mortgage guys to see about a new house to fit all your new stuff. Pack. Move. Fend of inquiries about kids…

It’s all good though! ;0)

5. Rob L. says… sep 15, 2005 | 12:49 am

Oh, Keith totally beat me to the reply I wanted to write…

It IS all good, but don’t expect things to calm down too much for at least a couple weeks after you’re back from the honeymoon.

Anyway, all best for the last month of preprations and the event itself.

6. Calrion says… sep 15, 2005 | 2:11 am

Others have already echoed my other comments (including the Reebok bit!), so I’ll just say one thing:

When all’s said and done, it’s worth it. So worth it.

7. Peter Asquith says… sep 15, 2005 | 6:07 am

On the day you won’t believe how quickly everything happens and how you both simply get carried along with it all.

All the planning pays off and even if you wanted to do stop for a spot of fine tuning you just can’t - it’s like being on a (fantastic) fairground attraction - the world just flashes by.


8. bearskinrug says… sep 15, 2005 | 6:29 am

Don’t forget - we have a softball game that day.

9. Dean says… sep 15, 2005 | 8:52 am

Did you know that when you sign that marriage license in the courthouse, you are for all intents and purposes married right then and there? At least that’s what the old codger told us when we got ours 16 years ago…

Congratulations and have fun at the wedding. And don’t forget to eat at the reception. We were so busy talking to people that the waitstaff took our plates away before we could get back to our table. We had to stop at the 7-11 on the way home for Tastykakes!

10. steve says… sep 15, 2005 | 9:05 am

tic toc… the final countdown to puting the boys in a jar on the shelf. nice.

Not sure why you’d want to rebook your honeymoon, you could proabbyl get a really goood deal on hotels now. (sorry for the off-color bad joke)

good luck and congrats, see you in December in Philly!! :)

11. David O’Hara says… sep 15, 2005 | 9:14 am

It’s truly an exciting time. Just remember the day isn’t about whether the flowers are perfect, the food tastes just right, or if the DJ rocks; it’s about getting married. At the end of the day that is all that matters. Congrats and I hope that you have a fantastic time!!

12. Rob Weychert says… sep 15, 2005 | 10:15 am

Are you gonna marry a carrot?

13. Joel Bernstein says… sep 15, 2005 | 10:42 am


14. Jason Beaird says… sep 15, 2005 | 10:45 am

The funny thing is that with all that planning, the day will be over before you know it and the next thing you know, you’ll be in a hotel room asking each other if “that” really all happened today. So don’t stress… Even if Rob isn’t ordained, you can’t dance, you run out of booze, the photographer is annoying, the flowers aren’t what she wanted, the tuxes don’t fit, or the music is all wrong…at the end of the day (or at least in a few months)…you’ll both be able to laugh about it together. Oh, and Liz will never want to see another wedding magazine again. Congrats!

15. Liz says… sep 15, 2005 | 10:45 am

Wait, I’m getting married? Holy shit, I had no idea, why didn’t someone tell me? There is so much to do! Oh wait, I AM getting married, I got all tied up in the wedding and forgot about the married part. Crap.

Just kidding! Thanks everyone so much for your support and words of wisdom. It always puts things in perspective to hear other peoples’ stories of how their big day, and even bigger life, came together. Stan and I have been so lucky to have you all. I want to send out a special THANK GOD FOR YOU to Niff Nicholls. She has gone above and beyond over the past few weeks in not only keeping me sane through this whole process, but in dealing with the details that I never even thought of. Niff, we couldn’t have pulled this whole thing off without you!

Now a few words about Stan. You all know how amazing he is. How brilliant and kind he is. I don’t need to tell you all that, it seems apparent that you get it. What takes my breath away every day though, is that Stan really understands the meaning of LOVE. I have never met anyone in my life who has been so open to it, who embraces it, and who lets it guide them. What a guy! How did I get so lucky?! I get to have this man as my husband. I’m getting MARRIED!

16. Bruno says… sep 15, 2005 | 10:50 am

Good luck, I am getting married on november 6 and I know exactly what you are talking about…

You forgot to mention the most common action on the months prior to the wedding… write checks, write checks, write checks.

I am pretty sure I’ve never written so many checks in my entire life until I decided to get married.

They say it’s workth it. It better be!

17. Jonathan Eckmier says… sep 15, 2005 | 10:57 am

As someone who just got married in May, I can tell you that it is totally worth all of the trouble and frustration you may be feeling.

The only piece of advice I can give you is to make sure you sit back and enjoy every moment of it. When it comes down to the wire, don’t worry too much about the little things, because you’ll be the only people that notice if they don’t get done perfectly.

Congratulations by the way!

18. Josh Watts says… sep 15, 2005 | 1:44 pm

I hear ya - one of the best things about getting married is that there’s no more “wedding” stuff that needs to be done. I’ve heard about people shagging all week during their honeymoon but in my case, we chilled like cucumbers because the entire “wedding” process is exhausting.

19. Niff says… sep 15, 2005 | 2:30 pm

I feel just as stressed about this wedding as stan and liz (i think) but it is all worth it. I know that in the end I am just helping out my best friends and taking the stress off of them.

This is the least i can do to pay you both back for all the love and fun you have given me.

I know I’m gonna cry my freaking eye out! =) Congrats you guys.
I only wish I could go on the honeymoon with you…and I know you guys want me too a little bit. ;)

20. Jason Santa Maria says… sep 15, 2005 | 6:29 pm

Thanks for all the kind words of encouragement everyone. Yes, there will be a bagpiper. Two years ago as we were sitting in Rittenhouse Park, some guy in a kilt starting walking around and playing. He was really good, so we went up and dropped some money in his bag. As we did so, we grabbed his business card and it’s been sitting on our fridge ever since. The card is still one my favorite business cards to date. Great big (filling the card) green type on a field of white that says simply “Bagpiper”. Then just an itty bitty phone number. That’s it. Perfection. When the time came, it was obvious who to call.

21. jordan says… sep 15, 2005 | 7:23 pm

Niff’s going to cry her eye out? Does she only have one, or will the other simply escape unscathed? ;)

Best of luck to you; I wish I could be there just for the bagpiper.

22. Jason Santa Maria says… sep 15, 2005 | 7:30 pm

I *think* Niff has two eyes… though they do seem to come out pretty easily…

23. Jacob Vance says… sep 15, 2005 | 9:37 pm

Wow. I’m going through exactly the same thing right now. We’re 3 weeks away here.

24. luxuryluke says… sep 16, 2005 | 1:58 am

It’s been a year, and she’s still always right.

25. Michael Murphy says… sep 16, 2005 | 11:26 am

Yes…always right. I was reminded of that just this morning as a matter of fact.

26. Liz says… sep 16, 2005 | 4:55 pm

Funny thing that I have learned over the years is that as much as I always WANT to be right, I am usually wrong! Stan knows this (and I painfully admit it, that’s right!)…but maybe I will be right more often once we are married!

27. Ara Pehlivanian says… sep 16, 2005 | 11:50 pm

Just make sure to slow down and enjoy the day. It goes by so fast that if you’ll need to remind yourself to eat. And dude, for what you’re paying, EAT!!!

Oh, and congrats! :-)

28. bandelin says… sep 17, 2005 | 9:42 am

jesus christ jason, I almost got the douche chills reading that. You almost sound like this guy:


29. Stefan Hayden says… sep 18, 2005 | 8:34 pm

you have a wedding web site for you’re family like Jermy?

I’d like to make one for my wedding and am tring to find some good examples.

30. Tim Hill says… sep 19, 2005 | 12:12 am

wait a minute…you can’t dance?

31. Jason Santa Maria says… sep 19, 2005 | 6:51 am

I can’t ballroom dance so we are taking lessons. I am fine dancing otherwise. I have always wanted to learn how to ballroom dance, it’s really cool.

32. Andrea Piernock Barrish says… sep 20, 2005 | 2:03 pm

Where are you taking ballroom dancing lessons? I would like to do that sometime, not for any particular reason. I just think it looks mighty fun, and it makes for interesting conversation, really.

I did not dance at my wedding, and thank goodness for that! I totally would have ruined his feet, especially in those sandals I was wearing.

33. Jason Santa Maria says… sep 20, 2005 | 8:45 pm

Andrea: We are going to The Academy of Ballroom and Social Dance at 2009 Sansom Street in Philly. It’s a tad pricey, but really worth it. The instructors are fantastic and very knowledgeable. They will help you learn just about anything you want to do.

34. satya says… sep 21, 2005 | 8:25 am

i came here wow what content
what articles… and then i read one month away … ha ha good one dude… cool post and even i thaught reebok honeymoon .. i was like what ?

but hey it’s gonna be great and the bagpiper idea is really good… wish u all lotsa love.… shine on diamond..


35. Andrea Piernock Barrish says… sep 21, 2005 | 9:36 am

The ABSD looks really classy. If you’re at the next PSO meeting tell me more about it before I take over your site here.

36. Alex says… sep 21, 2005 | 12:18 pm

Ahh, the wedding day… It flies right by, and then next thing you know you’re in bed counting all the money and gifts you received from the guests. (We have a “money dance” that we do traditionally, the people pay to dance with the bride and groom. We got close to $750. I highly recommend it.)

Enjoy your day, and don’t stress out too much when something doesn’t go exactly right. The guests won’t notice, because they don’t know how it’s supposed to go. Trust me, I actually SANG at my wedding (shudder…) I felt horrible because I know I messed up but, everyone in the place loved it.

So, enjoy your day. It really is the best thing that has happened to me. I wish you both the best of luck and all the happiness in the world.

37. Nathan Logan says… sep 21, 2005 | 12:53 pm

Stefan, I did a couple wedding sites (the last one being my own). They weren’t fully finished content-wise, but worked really well for RSVPs.

And congrats on the wedding, Jason. Our 4 months have been challenging, but truly great. The results are well worth the effort. Enjoy your day!

38. Ian says… sep 21, 2005 | 1:55 pm

Who’s watching your place while your gone?
And your job?

39. Dustin Diaz says… sep 21, 2005 | 11:28 pm

Don’t forget to eat breakfast on the morning of your wedding. Things will start happenin’ real fast. Next thing you know you’re on a fast track to starvation by 1 o’clock

40. moi says… sep 22, 2005 | 12:28 am


41. Sian says… sep 24, 2005 | 8:21 am

I’m being incredibly nosey I know but Bagpipes? Scottish blood or just something you fancy?

42. Jason Santa Maria says… sep 24, 2005 | 10:43 am

Actually both, Sian. Bagpipes are fun, and Scottish blood is on her side… but I am sure you figured that part… not that “Santa Maria” isn’t rich with Scottish heritage or anything ;D